Review: Disney's live-action 'Pinocchio' gets tied down by corporate and technological limitations
The wooden almost-boy Pinocchio sings “I got no strings to hold me down” in the 1940 Disney animated classic movie “Pinocchio” — and here, too, in a live-action/computer-animated hybrid that’s tied down, unfortunately, by Disney’s vault-raiding corporate strategy and director Robert Zemeckis’ addiction to technological whiz-bang spectacle over everything else.
The story, based on Carlo Collodi’s classic novel, is familiar to everyone by now, particularly the Disney variation. The kindly woodcarver Geppetto, lonely for companionship, carves a wooden boy that he names Pinocchio. The Blue Fairy hears the wish of Geppetto’s lonely heart, and brings Pinocchio to life — with the advice that if he’s brave, honest and unselfish, he will turn from wood into a real boy. Since Pinocchio doesn’t have a conscience to tell him right from wrong, the fairy assigns him one: Jiminy Cricket, a vagabond insect who becomes Pinocchio’s traveling companion and voice of wisdom.
What do Zemeckis and co-screenwriter Chris Weitz (“About a Boy”) add to this mix? A lot of surface details, and some familiar casting. Tom Hanks — Zemeckis’ stalwart collaborator in “Forrest Gump,” “Cast Away” and “The Polar Express” — is cast at Geppetto, apparently continuing the weird-accent run he started in “Elvis.” Jiminy Cricket is voiced by Joseph Gordon-Levitt, who starred in Zemeckis’ “The Walk.” The Blue Fairy is portrayed by Cynthia Erivo, who brings some elegance and hits the high notes on “When You Wish Upon a Star.”
Other than that, the only new wrinkle so far is the winking references to the Disney catalog in Geppetto’s collection of cuckoo clocks — which re-enact such classics as “Snow White and the Seven Dwarves” and Zemeckis’ own “Who Framed Roger Rabbit,” among others.
The story continues down the familiar path, as Pinocchio (voiced by Benjamin Evan Ainsworth) enters the big world and discovers its dangers. On his way to school, Pinocchio is distracted by Honest John, a fox (voiced by Keegan-Michael Key), and his silent cat companion, Gideon, with promises of fame and fortune — if Pinocchio joins the traveling puppet show put on by the nasty promoter Stromboli (Giuseppe Battiston). Pinocchio becomes star of Stromboli’s show, but also Stromboli’s prisoner. From that mess, Pinocchio lands in another, thanks to the Coachman (Luke Evans), on his way to Pleasure Island with a new caravan of wayward boys and girls (yup, Pleasure Island is now an equal-opportunity trap).
The computer animation that Zemeckis loves to play with (see “The Polar Express,” “Welcome to Marwen” and other motion-capture monstrosities on his filmography) becomes a trap in itself. It produces lifelike visuals that approximate the animated wonders we remember from the 1940 version. But relying on them denies the audience the experience of seeing the happy ending we wait for, to see Pinocchio finally become a real boy — because it’s impossible to hire a young actor who’s going to look enough like the Disney-copyrighted puppet we’ve been watching for the previous 90-plus minutes.
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‘Pinocchio’
★1/2
Starts streaming Thursday, September 8, on Disney+. Rated PG for peril/scary moments, rude material and some language. Running time: 105 minutes.